Profile

bio..um yeah about that..
well I was born illegitimately to a manic-depressed actress and a ne'r-do-well.
So my beginnings were terrific!

I once arm-wrestled Sam Donaldson for the last sip of warm, flat coca cola.

I spent three years as a roadie for Anne Murray. Damn that broad could party. After a stint in Betty Ford I felt I needed some depth; thus Livejournal.

I ran away when I was 16 and married a tortured stockbroker named Carlton. He really wanted to be an artist, but he felt his duty was to the stockholders, and when I was 19 I left him and took a greyhound to Louisiana and took up with a cajun oyster shucker with missing front teeth. I was never really sure what his name was because I hardly understood what he said.
After a few months of eating oysters and tobasco sauce, I wired my mother for money home and I have been spending several months organizing the toothpicks of a short jewish man named Morris.

There are a number of vague rumours about my affair with famed producer Robert Evans but I think it is best if we don't dwell upon that subject.

My next grand project is to photograph the fine macaroni art of thiscantbesoy She is able to show the ennui of being a seven year old without a spoon. We are hoping to get a MacArthur grant.

I often like to share my recipe for Macaroni and Cheese, it will soon be adapted into a David Mamet stage play.

so yeah... one time I broke my tailbone, it hurt.