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in the know
Apr. 30th, 2014 04:15 pmToday Miss Biscuit introduced me to her invisible friend. She is a miniature lion who is named Lian. (imagine saying Liam, but with an N.) Lian is five years old (older than Miss Biscuit) and really teeny tiny and rides on Miss Biscuit's back. I mentioned this invisible friend to Senor Onion who said, "oh yeah, she was born last Summer." Miss Biscuit said, "Yeah, but she's still five." Senor Onion told me, "Exactly, one year is five in lion years."
Apparently I am the last to know these things. Senor Onion knows everyone's invisible friends.
One of Senor Onion's dearest friends is coming over on Friday. I asked his Mother if her son had any dietary restrictions or food hang-ups. Pretty normal kid, but like my son, he only touches milk or water. Senor Onion does have a weakness for seven-up for special occasions but both of these boys have no interest in juice or other fizzy drinks. Come on kid, you are making me look smug here. Thankfully I know that Senor Onion would step over a dead relative to get to a bowl of caramel sauce. I had a quick conversation with the Mother when I was picking up Senor Onion, and you know it made me feel better when she mentioned that she had to take her boys and go and look for a brand-new coat that her younger son lost in someone's garden. I said, "oh... like Peter Rabbit." I feel better because I have still not found Senor Onion's fecking PE kit that got lost somehow during Easter break. I replaced the shoes and he has another set of PE clothes but christ on a cross...where the fuck is it. I need other semi-competent parents out there losing things so I don't feel like a fuck-up.
I am being asked to play a game of Sheeps, Lambs, and Sheepdogs. Another Miss Biscuit-created game. I am not sure how this one works but it will likely involve a lot of method acting and following rules put down by the draconian Miss Biscuit.
Apparently I am the last to know these things. Senor Onion knows everyone's invisible friends.
One of Senor Onion's dearest friends is coming over on Friday. I asked his Mother if her son had any dietary restrictions or food hang-ups. Pretty normal kid, but like my son, he only touches milk or water. Senor Onion does have a weakness for seven-up for special occasions but both of these boys have no interest in juice or other fizzy drinks. Come on kid, you are making me look smug here. Thankfully I know that Senor Onion would step over a dead relative to get to a bowl of caramel sauce. I had a quick conversation with the Mother when I was picking up Senor Onion, and you know it made me feel better when she mentioned that she had to take her boys and go and look for a brand-new coat that her younger son lost in someone's garden. I said, "oh... like Peter Rabbit." I feel better because I have still not found Senor Onion's fecking PE kit that got lost somehow during Easter break. I replaced the shoes and he has another set of PE clothes but christ on a cross...where the fuck is it. I need other semi-competent parents out there losing things so I don't feel like a fuck-up.
I am being asked to play a game of Sheeps, Lambs, and Sheepdogs. Another Miss Biscuit-created game. I am not sure how this one works but it will likely involve a lot of method acting and following rules put down by the draconian Miss Biscuit.
