I am this many

Miss Biscuit is so five. She woke up this morning asked Mr. Jenner, "Do I look bigger?"

It tasted pink.

Sometimes you just pour yourself into something. I had asked Miss Biscuit what sort of theme she wanted to do for her birthday party. She said Princess Pirate Rainbow. We discussed cakes. She saw a picture of a pirate ship cake and said, "like that." And then I began to put together things to combine the over-all theme. And this insane cake was born. A cake that I focused on when my brain was so low. Even when I am low, there is still this flicker of joy for my kids. The pilot light that doesn't go out. I baked and baked. I found as I began to create layers of rainbow cake, that I would have to double the recipe. That didn't bother me. I had eggs. I had butter. I had flour, and sugar. I washed bowls, and went to work and made more layers. I mixed things a bit to try and get something purple like. I added fresh blackberry jam to give it a different flavor. I created a template for the cake and cut things to shape and size. I made frosting. So much butter. So much icing sugar. Quite a bit of cream and vanilla. Let's pour everything wonderful into this. I loved the ridiculousness of the whole project. This massive cake. Five layers, five colors. A buttercream filling. Then I made more frosting and dyed it pink. VIVID CANDY PINK. Nothing delicate. I applied the crumb layer and realized I would need more frosting. Of course I would. More frosting. I did a bit of textured work so it would look a bit like the wood on a pirate ship. But in pink. Then today I decorated the thing with sweets, pretzels, and little plastic animal picks. Miss Biscuits army. I made sails and decorated them with stickers and bits of glitter, and pink. And then there were multi-colored candles. This cake was Miss Biscuit. The supreme confidence and electric personality of this fabulous five year old girl.

It was a good birthday party. Cousins came early to try out this bouncy caste we rented. Best money spent. It was a bright warm day, and the kids could bounce and bounce and be outside. Then friends began to arrive. Miss Biscuit's dearest best friend showed up, and oh the happiness. Lots of bouncing, playing with toys, grown-ups having tea, and moaning about the prices of houses, where everyone went on holidays, and family. Yes, even school yard Dad was there, but he was pretty darn pleasant. He was on my turf. Utter loveliness. I think I owned him completely when I gave him cake and ice cream that I made. I put together a plate of fruit that was arranged so that it was all rainbow. I made a cheese ball shaped like a skull. I should have put a crown on it. People always ask about cheese balls before they dive right in and eat it all up. Cheese balls people. You can never go wrong with a cheese ball. The house is filled with presents. I think one of her favorites came from her brother who got her a Jessie doll (from Toy Story.) She has wanted one for so long. It will go with her beloved Woody doll. The boys at the party stripped down to the waist and put on various pirate things and ran around like savages. Somehow we own a lot of pirate stuff for dress up. I mean A LOT, so that everyone could find something to wear if they so desired. And princess stuff. The cake went over well. And then I brought out the blackberry ice cream, and strawberry sorbet I had made. We got out cones, and the kids went wild. And then they got back on the bouncy castle. We sent everyone home with stickers, fortune-telling fish, rainbow marbled balloons, and chocolate gold coins.
Oof. The exhaustion. But it was... fun. I've done enough birthday parties now that I don't feel so worried.
Miss Biscuit was sad when the bouncy castle had to be deflated and picked up. She said, "My special day is over." Oh kiddo. What a day it was.