friday night thoughts.

[gfrancie]

I have been having conversations with other Catholic friends and family members about...everything. In particular the Pope's comments about the media's coverage as just playing on petty rumors.

Petty rumors.

What an insulting thing to say. I think a number of Catholics would be inclined to say, "OH REALLY?"
I think of the priest from my home town parish (that I have talked about a bit) who engaged in inappropriate behavior with teenaged girls. I think of my sister inlaw's Father who suffered horrifying abuse at the hands of priests in Ireland and I also think of someone who worked at my CYO summer camp when I was growing up. He was a counselor about the time I started going to summer camp and later on he was a director there and at the summer camp I went to as a teenager. An incredibly sweet guy and a few years ago he spoke publicly about the fact that he had been molested by a priest at summer camp. (the one I went to as a kid) It was a really awful situation. The priest was a charismatic figure and well known for a lot of good work. The priest had a lot of demons and later on the director came forward about what had happened to him. (about the time he became a camp counselor) There was a financial settlement with the diocese. What I always found interesting is that the director went to work in the place where the molestation had happened. He is a guy who really had his faith thrown for a loop and the whole experience had a profound effect on his life. He went from being an out-going kid to being filled with a lot of hate and depression. Years later he spoke with the priest and forgave him but was really upset when he learned how many other kids had been abused. The director obviously loved his job and provided a safe and wonderful experience for kids. When more public allegations came out the priest asked to be de-frocked but he never faced any criminal charges for molesting kids. I found out recently that this priest molested another well-known counselor and (someone my brother recalled fondly from his days at Summer camp.) Again this counselor obviously was able to take something from this situation so that others didn't experience the same thing.

Pope Nazi-pants the Dickith indeed...

Comments

[solar-diablo.livejournal.com]

Newsweek's cover this week has a large picture of the Virgin with the title "What Would Mary Do?"

As I walked by the magazine stand in the grocery store and blurted out "She wouldn't be molesting children, DUH."

The most disgusting thing I've heard regarding this whole scandal is not once, but twice somebody in the media alluded to the fact that while yes, this is all tragic, we must bear in mind that the majority of the kids affected when not children, but post-pubescent boys. One of the people saying this was some conservative pundit, the other directly involved in the Catholic Church. That they would even bring this up (ostensibly in the name of "facts" but in reality an attempt to mitigate the damage somewhat) was beyond the pale.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

Amen.

[artemis-moon.livejournal.com]

Well, I am not Catholic but I know it would bother me greatly to hear of such things in my belief. I have loathing each time I hear about it though because it doesn't seem to be a relevant enough subject to take a stance on.

Oh No, You Di'unt!

[epiphany.livejournal.com]

Child molestation is not a relevant enough subject to take a stance on?

Re: Oh No, You Di'unt!

[artemis-moon.livejournal.com]

I mean it doesn't seem relevant enough to the Catholic Church to take a stance on, which they should.

[epiphany.livejournal.com]

Taking a stance would mean acknowledging that it happened and doing that might mean having to move that rug that they've been sweeping all these priestly cases of misconduct under. Admitting a mistake is not something that the Catholic church has ever done in my understanding, and they've been making BIG mistakes for centuries.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

the stance is -the fucking vatican and the church KNEW what was going on and did nothing.

[epiphany.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I just read about this situation with this particular priest today. What I always think about is for each one of these situations that come up in the press, how many more have there been that were resolved with discreet settlements that will never come to light? For every kid who speaks up, how many more will end up drinking, eating, doing drugs, trying to numb the pain and never telling anyone?

Petty rumors, my eye.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

There are a lot of native people from Alaska (where many pedophile priests were dumped since it was considered "off the grid") and it merely added to the culture of death and dispair. Many have come forward about the abuse they suffered and the rate of suicide, substance abuse and homelessness is soooooo high.

[todayiamadaisy]

Petty rumours, indeed. Two from my home town (a priest and a brother) are currently doing time after years of cover ups. Nothing petty about the hurt and damage they caused to the individuals and families and communities who trusted them. Even if the senior people in the Vatican have forgotten what it's like to work at ground level, at the very least I don't see why they can't understand that by covering up the bad apples, they're tainting the good ones too.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

The disconnect is amazing.

[cutebutpsycho99.livejournal.com]

PETTY RUMORS? The hell? I now want to have a discussion with the Pope.

Or to quote Henry Rollins (who I saw last night): "HOMOSEXUALS BAD....Pedophilia...that's a gray area." And I'm with him, it's not all Catholics, it's as he put it, Catholicism INC.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

Yes. Many people want to have a discussion with the pope.
Henry Rollins is right. (that made me laugh)

[mialoubug.livejournal.com]

This is pedophilia, pure and simple. It's not a gray area nor is it petty rumors -- its criminial and abusive and an abuse of power. I live in Boston and have been watching this unfold from within for many years (I have a very, very good friend who works for the Archdiocese, first working for Law now O'Malley, both cut from the same cloth as the pope). What the pope, the Vatican and the other neo-Catholics have been saying about priest abuse that does NOT include criminial prosecution, defrocking and massive apologies to the victims is inexcusable. This is THE worst pope that could ever have been elected (or bought the seat) during this time.

The friend I mention above said that one of the older priests she works with (a really nice guy, he is someone who is well respected AND not an abuser), likened the current Vatican regime to La Costra Nosa. I don't think he's that far off the mark.

[gfrancie.livejournal.com]

WORD.
They are so concerned with protecting themselves and then they don't understand the immense anger and disgust. Talk about being out of touch with reality.

[la-sherazade.livejournal.com]

Did you hear the bit about the "fixer" for the Church on This American Life? This poor monk who was sent to patch things up when priests molested people--it caused him to eventually lose his faith, at least his faith in the church, and now he helps the victims as a layperson.
I was saying to Larry that one thing I think people don't get is that molestation by a priest is not only horrible because of the religious factor (i.e. the fact that they are supposed to provide a model of righteous behavior), but really the truly terrible thing is that priests play a role akin to that of a therapist for their parishioners. So, say someone is molesting you, and you want to turn to someone for help/to talk about it--you can't turn to your molester! People need to get over the religious aspect, IMHO, and realize that it's not about bashing the Church, it should be about making sure that all care-givers in our society (doctors, therapists, teachers, priests) are held responsible for how they treat their patients/parishioners. These are people who are supposed to protect and guide us, that is the true betrayal.

I know the Catholic church is getting a lot of flack right now, and certainly there are things to be criticized within the institution itself, but I just want to say that people should realize this is no way reflects upon the average Catholic. (What people don't talk about enough--except for Dan Savage--is how often Protestant youth ministers and ministers also molest kids/young girls. It's not a problem limited to the CC!!!) Anyway, what I am trying to say in a clumsy way is that I think people need to be supportive of Catholics, who are weathering this storm despite being perfectly innocent, and stop blaming them or associating them with the deeds of a few (?) members of the clergy. I feel like it's probably a hard time to be a Catholic, and that just shouldn't be so.

[oxymoron67.livejournal.com]

The fixer on This American Life. Fascinating. I understand how he walked away from the Church, because I'm considering doing the same.

But the reality is, these priests did these things over and over again, and frequently parents/adults saw things and didn't see OR on occasions when victims came forward, their fellow parishoners bullied them into silence.

The reality is that all Catholics *DO* share some of the guilt here. We participated in a culture of silence and unquestionable obedience to an authority that chose cover up over honesty.

In Catholic faith, this is called a sin of omission: knowing that there is a correct thing to do then choosing not to do it.

[runerspad.livejournal.com]

There is also something to be said about the psychology of 30+ years ago when this was happening which understood pedophilia (and homosexuality) as an illness to be cured or healed.

We've become such goldfish that we assume the social, medical and cultural reality of today is the same as during the 50-70's (for the Irish and Milwaukee issues in particular) and criticize accordingly. The Church is a target because it's apparently more socially acceptable to attack Catholics than Boy Scouts or Protestant churches.

What gets completely ignored in the discussion is today's reality. The Catholic church will not (and can not) ignore allegations of abuse, will actively investigate and take appropriate action. As a youth leader, I'm not even allowed to take one of my teens out for coffee by myself. It's policies like this and the current culture amongst the priesthood and religious which is the reality, not the actions of 40 years ago.

[bliss-street.livejournal.com]

If you haven't seen this yet, it's pretty damning:

http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2010/04/the-third-strike.html