and to all a good night.

Well Well Well....
It is still warm out. Too warm and I suspect this is what is bringing the asshole out in many a customer.

I think we should title this asshole redux.

I had someone who wanted a blue book that was funny. Nasty German women who wanted books that had pictures of buildings in Seattle and nothing I showed them made them happy. I half expected them to shout, "SCHNELL" and beat me. There was the man who came up and told me why he didn't want a discount card (I never even asked him...) and people who threw magazines everywhere, left coffee on bookshelves (what the fuck is up with that?) and people whining.

I am kind of at the edge. I may hurt a customer if they don't get their crap together.

There is something I have been wanting to talk about with the Great American public for sometime.
It is about speaking clearly. I am not talking about the shy people. I know shy people and while they may be quiet, most are able to speak in clear sentences.
I can't understand a damn word you are saying if you mumble. I don't care if the cool kids at school mumble, when you speak to me, just speak clearly. I am not asking much. You don't need to shout or whisper, just speak in a calm, possibly polite tone. I don't like having to ask three times what you are looking for. I don't know how people got it in their head that talking like Marlon Brando on quaaludes was a good idea. They had better stop it, or I will start putting some marbles in some mouths pretty gosh-darned soon.
If you have to, go to speech therapy to get help.
Lord I am sick of trying to make out what people are trying to say.

And that's another thing
I don't know about the rest of you folk, but when I was a child, my mother told me it was rude to interrupt someone who was on the telephone. She said you wait until an appropriate pause and then ask your question, but only if it is an emergency. If it can wait a moment or two then you stand there patiently. You don't start talking like the person is just sitting there.
I wonder sometimes...
People are always interrupting me while I am talking to another customer. They don't say excuse me, they just launch into the conversation like the other person does not exist. They will try and grab me, while I am helping someone else.

I want this to stop as well. I may have to send many of you a copy of Miss Manners' book. That might help you.

Let's start with some simple phrases.

"Excuse me"

"Can you please help me?"

"thank you"

I am not that bastard customer service person who ignores you on purpose. Often I may be on the telephone with someone else. Or I may be helping someone else, but I will always acknowledge you, I will make sure someone will help you quickly. Hell I have gone sooooooooo far out of my way to make someone happy and yet most of the dumb-fucks out there don't even say thank you.

Is that sooooooooooo fucking hard? Am I asking you to do something that is on the level of complicated as say...oh I don't know coming up with a cure for cancer?

I may have a damn stroke.

I need to have a vacation.
Summer has taken its toll.

Okay, I think that is enough from the complaints department.

*takes a deep breath*

Okay in slightly more cheerful news, I visited the perfume fairies at Nordstroms and oh sweet mary they gave me tons of free samples and said my hair looks pretty. I love the perfume fairies can I take them home with me?

I bought some really beautiful nectarines. I am not quite sure what I should do with them, but somehow I think cream will be involved.

Another minor highlight of my day was having some fresh shrimp phad thai. Those lovely people at Cafe Saigon make a great lunch. It improved my mood considerably.

Another thing improved my mood. A new issue of Vanity Fair. My favorite guilty pleasure of the periodical world does so much for my tired and weary soul at the end of a long overly warm day.

I need to lie on the sofa for awhile with my swollen feet. Reading about the royal family of Monaco while eating chocolate.

Phew.

Oh yes...

Happy Birthday to wankle He hates dumb-fucks too. So he rocks.

Amen