Trying to raise people

Yesterday in the car I had my nieces, and Miss Biscuit with me. (I had picked up the girls and we were on our way to a birthday party.) And they were being hams in the back and then I heard Miss Biscuit say/do something racist. It is something a number of children do. (but shouldn't do.) She obviously had no idea what it meant. I said, "Hey, Miss Biscuit, you really shouldn't do that. It hurts the feelings of many Asian people. It isn't very kind." She kinda flipped out and burst into tears and covered her face. So I had to quickly sort this WHILE driving on winding country roads. I told her, "Hey you aren't in trouble. You really aren't in trouble at all. You just didn't know. Remember you are seven years old and you are still learning about the world. You are seeing and hearing things that you may not always understand the full meaning of." I handed her a hankie.
I asked if she had seen/heard that on the playground at school -she had. I said, "yeah kids often repeat things in ignorance. But you are getting to learn more about kindness right now. So it is okay. We have to be kind. We have to consider how other people feel when we say and do things when it has to do with who they are. And we have to listen to them when they say something is hurtful. Just like we do at home."
One of her cousins said, "oh yeah. Someone did that thing at school and I. (this is a friend of the girls who was born in Thailand) said to them, 'I don't think you should do that.' and I. NEVER says anything like that to people, so it was good to know."
(see people, even seven and eight year olds can suss out things.)

I talked more with Miss Biscuit about it this morning. She was still terribly embarrassed about things. I had to repeat that she wasn't in trouble, that she just had her first experience with cultural ignorance. I explained why it was hurtful, and how some people have some really foolish ideas about how people look and what they think it means when people's bodies are different from others. (I referenced Peter Spier's People book which talks about how unique and different people are and how wonderful that is.) And that she was ahead of many adults (including that man who is the president elect) because she was capable of learning, and that she HAD learned something important, and that she will hopefully be a kinder person in the world. (something that man could never be.) She began to laugh at that. Then I told her, "If you see other people do that, you have a job to tell them that they are being hurtful and shouldn't do that. Sometimes part of kindness means being brave and telling people when they are hurtful to others."

Yes we live in a place where there aren't a lot of people who different from us. (though the Asian population is slowly growing around here which is pretty cool.) But I remember that I grew up where there were quite a few Asian people, and kids would still do that stupid thing with their eyes and saying, "Chinese, Japanese..." One of my childhood friends was Vietnamese-American (his dad ran a restaurant near the restaurant my father worked in, so we played together a lot. We would go and catch shrimp and have his dad fry it up, or we would get french fries from my dad.) and I have distinct memories (when I was about the same age as Miss Biscuit) of kids who were his friends doing that to him. I don't recall any adults saying, "Don't do that. That is dumb." And of course he really didn't say anything about it. So even when you live in a place that is a little more culturally diverse, kids will do dumb things. I still drag the kids to London so they can see that people are different and have wonderful beautiful lives and cultures that are incredibly valuable. "LOOK LOOK... SO MUCH AWESOMENESS!!!"
I hope it all pays off.