how to do london. quick.

We dragged the children to London recently. Dragged isn't the right word I suppose. They enjoy London a lot. But it was kind of a packed few days since we haven't really taken them on holiday this year. (this year money went to things like fixing the boiler, and the car, and other boring grown up stuff. Next year maybe.) We promptly dropped our bags off at our hotel and went to the Imperial War Museum. Because all children like war. Or at least have an interest in aspects of it. Miss Biscuit wanted to see some planes and things. Which she did. She really took to the planes, the rockets, the tanks, and the motorcycle with a sidecar AND machine gun. She likes things that make noise and can cause some terror. Senor Onion was more keen on the enigma machine, and the interactive computer version you could try out. (they both enjoyed that a lot.) The home front side was kind of cool for them because they could see some of the stuff that their Nanny D has mentioned, and there was an anderson shelter they could climb into, and then listen to the air raid sirens. They were really taken with the map that showed how much of London was bombed. Here is Nanny D's childhood all in one place. Then we had cake and tea and talked about the futility of war before returning to the hotel for introverted screen time. We had Mexican food which wasn't bad. Some of it was a bit spicy for some members of the family. But the real win was churros. Miss Biscuit said, "This is what you should feed seven year olds." She had dawdled the whole way to the restaurant but after tortilla chips and churros she raced the whole way back to the hotel.
The next day it was a day I carefully planned and I suspect we pushed it a bit much but dang the kids saw a lot.
Senor Onion (ever the architecture fan) asked to see the Westminster. He just wanted to have a good look at the outside of the palace. So we did. It is big. It is ornate. It is falling down. We walked past assorted buildings around Whitehall, past the PM's home, and observed the different styles of building, and he thought it was great how you could have so many different kinds of buildings pushed up against one another. Then it was off to the Science Museum. A slight disappointment as their favorite floor is closed right now. I hadn't thought to check. It is the place where you can play and touch EVERYTHING. But we did the best with what we had. Miss Biscuit liked looking at the steam engines and other inventions of the last couple hundred years. Senor Onion liked space, and I think we were all amused by the secret life of the home. After that it was the Natural History Museum which was pretty awesome. I have never been there before. The kids LOVED the area devoted to earthquakes and volcanoes. Loads of things to touch and examine. (Senor Onion was intrigued by the display that shows all the seismic activity for the past 7 days. Earth is always moving.) Miss Biscuit favored the Kobe super market earthquake simulation. We had lunch and then looked at all of the ancient stuffed animals. So many. And so old. Including a few extinct creatures. We all want our own pet dodo.

Then a bit of shopping. And like any good mother I accidentally took my children through a bit of a red-light district in Soho. It should be noted I once did the same thing in Amsterdam. I don't mean to walk my children through neighborhoods where it says in NEON letters, "HOT SEX NOW" and the like. They haven't asked me about it, but hey, all part of the fun and adventure of city life. So many colors! We went to a comic book shop where they bought a number of good things to read, then we went to a shoe shop and bought Mr. Jenner a new pair of shoes as his old pair had long gone home to Jesus. I had done my research, told him which shoes would be to his liking, got him fitted and out of there in five minutes. He appreciated my help. THEN more fun on the tube and a trip to The Tower of London. Because all children need to go there at least once so they can say, "yep. been there." We saw the crown jewels which Miss Biscuit LOVED. She saw all these big fuck-off crowns and the one she really liked was the tiny wee one worn by Queen Victoria after she was widowed. "WHERE can I get one of those????" You have good taste kid. Very good taste. We walked here and there, looked at the dungeons, and the towers, and the watched some people in period costume, and had a good look at the ravens who were loitering on some stairs. I half-expected to see them smoking. But the kids were pretty tired at that point. Thank goodness for ice cream. And plenty of benches. Loads of moaning and exhaustion. Because it is a family outing. In keeping with the meal theme of Mama's North American roots, we had American bbq for dinner. Well Mr. Jenner and I ate a bunch of meat. It was delicious and wonderful. Burnt ends too! Senor Onion had TWO corndogs, fries, and root beer and declared that we must return to this restaurant some time. Miss Biscuit had macaroni and cheese and corn muffins. She actually ate her dinner. Most of it. A rare display. Finally a bus ride back to the hotel, and sleep. Because we had to be up early the next day for photos and a visit to the US embassy. Always a good time there. Passport photos were done at this one place near the embassy that is quick and good. And they also do Tilda Swinton's passport photos. (along with other celebrities but really we just care about her photo.)
The embassy is always a fun time. A very particular way of getting in. And then you are sent to wait. With everyone else. ALL of the Americans. Many people with young children, and a few babies being registered. I have always liked the children's play area because they put some real thought into it. A place for kids to work their yayas out, some toys to bliss out on, and the tv turned to Cbeebies. Senor Onion brought an archie comic with him, and read while Mr. Jenner waited in line, and I hung out with Miss Biscuit. Well she went off to play and I enjoyed the wi-fi. They saw Senor Onion and said, "yep, that is your kid, and his application for a new passport has been approved." Everyone is so friendly and cheerful. Must be one sweet gig. A nice hit of America for an hour and a half.
THEN we went to the Borough market and ate delicious things, bought cheese, and took the train home.
Next time must remember a bit more built-in down time for the kids and don't make them walk 12 miles in one day. Because they get pretty worn out by the end.
The passport arrived today. Hurrah.